And so, our high school season ends.
Yes, it’s October. Yes, we should be reviewing horror movies. But we decided to do high school movies instead, and that’s not because we’re all going through our quarter life crisis. So get off our backs. Jeez.
Determined to fulfil our bi-weekly promise of reviewing movies from the 80s, 90s and 00s, we decided to review three movies from the 80s, 90s, and you guessed it.
I (Roisin) was sceptical at first.“The noughties!”, I cried. “But that was a time when bold colours went out of fashion, when phones no longer had cords, and when we stopped calling the year 2000 the Willenium. I don’t know what to do with the noughties.”
“But we also had a lot of great things in the noughties”, Rudi reassured me. “Social media allowed us to stay in touch with our peers and world events, and develop toxic relationships with both. We stopped associating terrorism with the Irish. And the world began to pay more attention to climate change, because the climate started to change.”
“Plus, Will Smith did Hitch”, Jeff piped up.
Having forgotten about Hitch, I was immediately comforted that the noughties weren’t the start of the slow decline into humanity’s demise that I originally thought they were.
Now, if I ask you to name the most annoying little shit on our screens in the 80s, who would you say?
That’s right, it’s Ferris Bueller.
Ferris is just a normal, precocious teenager who is adored unanimously by the entire population of Chicago. Ferris struggles with all the normal teenager things. You remember when your headmaster was so determined to destroy you that he broke into your house? And when your supermodel girlfriend flirted with your Dad so he wouldn’t catch you on your way back from a parade where approximately 1,000 strangers danced to you lip syncing The Beatles? Of course you do. We’ve all been there. Ferris’ best friend contemplates suicide, which is a sensible decision given that continuing to live means continuing to be friends with Ferris. And this brings us onto our 90s high school flick.
Cher Horowitz is just a normal, precocious teenager, with a revolving wardrobe who is adored by people who don’t know any better. Although this movie features a meta-narration and a meandering plot, it’s still one step closer to realism than Ferris Bueller. Plus, it stars a seemingly ageless Paul Rudd, who is apparently blessed with Benjamin Button syndrome and currently assumes the appearance of an infant. Instead of making her friends feel like shit by being too perfect, Cher tries to empower her friends and share her popularity. Like Matthew Broderick in Ferris, ASS (Alicia Silverstone) is still best known for this movie, because even though she’s obviously insufferable, she still manages to be likable.
Fast-forward to our previously uncharted territory of the 00s. Seth and Evan are just normal precocious teenagers. That’s it. They’re awkward as hell, have crushes on girls who are way out of their leagues, glamourize alcohol and are determined to get laid. It’s like looking into a mirror. And this is what is so affecting about Superbad. It’s so real it hurts. If Seth tried to crash a parade so he could lip sync to Twist and Shout, he’d get the shit kicked out of him – because that’s what would happen in real life.
So what do these three, seemingly very different high school movies have in common?
Simple: friendship. All three end with a moral about the power but inherent unsustainability of teenage friendships. Those people who are so important to you can also be the only people in the world to make you feel like crap, insecure, limited or inadequate. And therein lies the beautiful duality. Because let’s face it: sometimes your friends are assholes, but you love them anyway.
Let us know your favourite high school flick by reaching out to us on social media. Like our teenage protagonists, nothing is more important to us than feeling popular.